In this episode, I share day 5 of the 10 minute cross stitch challenge. You can listen to the episode below to help keep you on track with the challenge. Or keep scrolling to read the tips from today.
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10 Minute Cross Stitch Challenge: glimmers
Guilt
This episode is really about guilt and feeling guilty when you take time out for yourself.
I know those feelings well. You sit down and think there are a million other things you “should” be doing. The dishes, laundry, hoovering, etc.
These thoughts are not helpful when you are trying to relax. I have an episode deep diving into this called Are You Really Relaxing? which you can listen to here.
Reinforcing how important taking time for yourself is helps calm those guilty feelings.
In his book Scattered Minds*, Gabor Mate talks about how the people with the highest regard for themselves also give themselves time.
He goes on to explain that if you are trying to be an important person; a teacher, a parent, a boss, or a leader, for example, then you should be important enough to have your own time for your interests and self-care.
This hit me and I wanted to share it with you as something to reflect on.
Glimmers
My therapist gave me a sheet of paper with traffic lights on which represented safe (green) fight/flight (amber) and freeze (red).
Next to the amber and red was the word “triggers” and next to the green was the word “glimmers”. I had never heard of a glimmer, but it is the opposite of a trigger. It is what relaxes you, gets you into a flow state and calms your nervous system.
At first, I couldn’t think of any glimmers, until I realised glimmers were very similar to hobbies. And I have a lot of those.
I now love the word glimmer.
Knowing how good you feel when you do a hobby is one thing. When you are told it scientifically take syou out of fight and flight, calms your nervous system, and gets you into the social part of your brain is quite another.
When you hear it from a professional (ie my therapist) you take it a little more seriously and feel that you are “allowed” to do it.
I don’t have many issues with guilty feelings during hobby time any more but they still come up. Especially if the house is particularly untidy or there is laundry waiting to be folded, for example.
Knowing about this traffic light system helped me realise how important it is to fill your day with as many glimmers as you can to keep yourself in the green. That is why I love talking about the power of 10 minutes and filling your gaps.
The more time you spend in green the more used your body gets to staying there for longer periods.
I am not a doctor, so if you are reading this and thinking you spend a lot of your day with anxiety, worry or anger then please seek professional help.
What are your glimmers? Write them down and see what you can come up with. I already know your first one! Then try and do as many of them as you can during your day.
Hobbies are usually the final thing on the list to be spoken about in the well-being space. But they are so important! They are a huge part of our overall well-being.
Not only are they fun, but they can help relax our minds and take our bodies right down to green.
I hope this helps you realise why hobbies are important so go make your list of glimmers and make fun a bigger part of your day.
Extra episodes and posts
- My Cross Stitch and Reading Routine
- 5 Tips to Find More Time to Cross Stitch
- Cross Stitch Routines and Why You Might Need One